Piece of Chocolate

It's been a long week but there's one more week to grit through. Once it's over I can finally pay attention to myself better.
I have a bad left knee. I don't know why but one day it just started to pull and from then on it has never ceased to be sensitive. That was a life changing moment for me in that I had just become a runner and I loved it. I felt like running was the one thing that liberated me physically. It got me closer to my inner child - I felt alive. I've tried to find alternatives and they do work, don't get me wrong, but there's something about running or just leaping that I am hoping I can get back to soon.

I walked home from Upper Queen Anne today after finding out that I took a cab there for an empty carton of Gardasil. It's ok the walk made up for it. I meandered took pictures, ate ice cream, went to a book store, fell in love with Upper Queen Anne, then made it to the Seattle Center for a quick run through of the Japanese festival. If there's anything you should know about me, it's that I secretly wish I were Japanese. That's probably silly thinking is what most would say. I have my reasons. I think they are quite obvious.
Anyway as I was walking I remembered where it was that I left the old Fatima that I felt at home with. I haven't been able to stop and really enjoy a moment since Spring Break. Even that felt short lived as school was right around the corner and I had homework to do as well.

Today despite the fact that I have a billion things to do tomorrow and the day after - I felt a little ray of sunshine in my life that I had shut out because I felt I had no time for it anymore. I really want to say fuck my knee and start running again - I want the liberation - I need the liberation. I need to set myself free since I have put a cage around myself on top of the one I was in a year ago. I want to believe I am worthwhile again especially in my field.





Not to sound all preachy or elderly and what not but seriously to the people who are below 25 years old:

Don't buy into the idea that you have to hyperventilate through your life. You're young, enjoy your youth - not by exhausting yourself or living within a 5 min frame of mind. Savor the moment. Eat a piece of chocolate and let it sit on your tongue for at least 10 seconds before you chew and swallow it. Your life is that piece of chocolate. You are not a robot. Only Daft Punk are robots but hey even they admit that they are "Human after all". So why can't you?

Peace.

 

 Not the biggest Bruno Mars fan but this song has been stuck in my head. So I will leave you off with it. I'm not a fan of the video though - only because the women look like they're about to jizz themselves for no reason. Just saying.